Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
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