Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
