I'm eating all of the evidence.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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