no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I party with great urgency now.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
