Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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