wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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