An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
It was confusing and full of hummus
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize