friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
