Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
