I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
