I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
