I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
