I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Randomize
