you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize