and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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