Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
