question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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