A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
The adults are the big ones right?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
