Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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