Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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