but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
