Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
