Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
