I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
this will be a night to untag.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize
