Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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