R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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