He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
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