So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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