Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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