he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Just invented taco cereal.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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