Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
