I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
