do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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