Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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