Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
