dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
