Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
It's official drugs can't kill me
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize