So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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