and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
