It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
