I wannas sexs uuuuu
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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