Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
