Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
