Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
