We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
