now i know why i became what i already was.
Too much gin, very little bucket
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Randomize
