also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
