I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Randomize
