booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize