absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize