My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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