it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
